A Mom Shared Her Huge Family Bed & The Internet Had Feelings
Cassey Bly showed a reset of her family bed, which sleeps her family of five.
Moms are pretty good at withholding judgment, shrugging, and saying, “Live and let live,” when it comes to other people’s choices. But there are are few parenting topics — like breast vs. bottle and working mom vs. stay-at-home mom — that seem to turn ugly fast whenever they come up.
Also on the top of this list? The family bed.
Some people think that it’s a giant, cozy pig pile of love that shouldn’t have an age limit. Other people think it’s a logistical nightmare at best and totally inappropriate independence-crusher at worst.
Enter Cassey Bly, a 29-year-old stay-at-home mom of three. She enjoys life, renovating her new home, and making cute reset videos on TikTok. Everything was fine until she shared a video that showed her making her family bed — and suddenly, everyone had a lot to say.
The bed — which another video explains is two queen beds pushed together — looks incredibly big and cozy, made with matching sheets, four sets of pillows, and piles of blankets, ostensibly holding her entire family of five each night. Another video shows that it also does a great job of organizing laundry.
And in the video, Bly simply changes the linens for the week.
The comments came in fast and rough.
“... the family WHAT,” reads the most popular comment, which has been liked over 10,000 times.
“Oh hell no,” reads the second.
A third person took a little more time to explain their rejection of the concept. “This is absolutely bizarro to me. I need personal space and alone time so my children slept in their own rooms. It led to such a calm lifestyle for all of us. Appreciate together time and alone time,” they wrote.
“My kids would *adore* this,” another quipped. “I’ll not be showing them this post!!!!”
On the other hand, there were some family bed supporters further down the ranks.
“I just know those kids nervous systems are regulated and they feel so secure to go to sleep,” one person wrote.
“Sleeping next to my whole world??? Omg I bet you are the absolute comfiest at night,” another added.
“Kids are climbing into the bed anyway. Might as well be comfortable,” read another response (that seems pretty sensible!).
Of course, there was one comment everyone could agree on:
“This is my dream bed, but just for myself,” wrote one queen (who deserves two queens).
What do the experts have to say about having a family bed?
Sharing a bed with an infant comes with an increased risk of SIDS, and the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends against this for the first six months of a kid’s life.
But for older babies, toddlers, and school-aged kids, the answer is not as clear. A Swedish study found that bed sharing is common among all kids, whether or not parents promote it or not, and that it doesn’t cause an increase or decrease in sleep disturbances as kids age. Other studies have found that it can increase security, closeness, and confidence while decreasing anxiety. Most studies point out that the practice is largely cultural and has happened in some cultures for centuries.
Still — the bottom line here is, “to each their own.” Don’t yuck another person’s bed! Find what works for you, and just keep enjoying those Sunday reset TikToks while keeping your opinions to yourself.
