Wife Shares The Ultimate "If He Wanted To He Would" Example
TikTok creator Sarah Baus’ husband just raised the bar for men everywhere and we thank him for his service.
A common refrain in relationship advice these days is the idea of “If he wanted to, he would.” It’s usually used as a kind of reality check for women who feel as though their boyfriend/husband/partner isn’t contributing their fair share, either in the relationship, household, or parenting. The idea is that if he wanted to step up, he would, so if he’s not, it’s because he doesn’t.
TikTok creator Sarah Baus recently shared that she actually hates this adage, but has a problem: “I have the embodiment of ‘if he wanted to he would’ in my home.” And guys? It is too pure.
“For Christmas, I asked for a spray tan subscription,” Baus explains. This isn’t a cheap gift: each session costs $70. But hey, ‘tis the season, right? Depending on family budget, it’s a pretty easy gift to give: run by the salon, buy a subscription, and put the envelope in his wife’s stocking. Heck, you might even be able to get away with doing it all digitally! But Baus’ husband wasn’t content to do the bare minimum, even though that in and of itself would have been really sweet and considerate.
“Instead of doing that, my husband went out and got an entire spray tan kit, a spray tent, and then ... took the board certification class,” she says. “He is now a Board certified tanner and he made sure I could get spray tans at home. Like, he taught himself to do spray tans so I didn’t have to go anywhere, and he did a damn good job!”
Dear fellas: we regret to inform you that the bar has been raised.
And, bonus! This loving act of kindness (and, it must be said, going absolutely above and beyond) is apparently also a cost-saving measure. For $300, Baus says, her husband got the kit, the tent, and the certification course. So basically, it “pays for itself” within five sessions.
The comments section was here for all of it.
“As a nation, we need to protect this man at all costs,” wrote one.
“Get you a man who will get certified just to save money, time, and the genuine appreciation for doing it,” praises another.
A third simply tells Baus, “Babe, that’s your soul mate.” (She knows.)
While some lamented their lack of attentive partners, others shared sweet moments from their own relationships.
“I wanted colored extension braids so he watched a ton of YouTube videos and does it for me whenever I want,” wrote one commenter.
“I went through a bad time with no money and kept a note with every crazy meal I fantasized about while starving,” says another. “He found it, learned to cook, and for a year made every single item on that list.”
“Hubby asked me what I wanted and I told him a white Christmas, joking,” relates another. “That man Googled ‘commercial snow machine,’ built it, and set it up outside of our bay window. I had a white Christmas.”
Honestly, we can’t get enough of this stuff. And, of course, not every day or romantic moment needs to be this grand or over-the-top... but it is heartwarming to see that there are apparently plenty of guys out there who won’t let little things like not knowing how to do something or board certifications get in the way of trying to be a better partner.
