Parenting

30+ Weed And Stoner Quotes To Accompany The Perfect High

by Deirdre Kaye
Updated: 
Originally Published: 
stoner quotes
Sharon McCutcheon/Unsplash

Sometimes, you just need some solid stoner quotes to help you get baked. Granted, weed might just be one of the most hotly contested debates in America right now. Depending on what state you’re in, marijuana has varying levels of legalization and criminalization. Its chemical makeup created a buzz around using it recreationally. But it’s not without highly important medical backing, either. Weed has been shown to help with cancer. It’s also often prescribed to patients dealing with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. Among other ways it’s useful to those with PTSD, it disrupts the cycle of sleep that often triggers nightmares associated with traumatic flashbacks. One chemical found in marijuana, CBD, is now used in everything from nice, relaxing foot creams to Martha Stewart-backed gumdrops. Yum, man.

And Martha Stewart isn’t even the only big name backing the use of weed. Weed use has also been linked to such historical figures as Shakespeare and Queen Elizabeth I. While its use is quite different, it’s worth mentioning that founding fathers Thomas Jefferson and George Washington both grew hemp on their estates. Shoot, even the world’s foremost tour guide, Rick Steves, is a known “pothead.”

With legalization on the rise, pot use should hold less of a stigma, right? That probably depends on what country you’re in. And, let’s face it: If you’re a pothead, you probably don’t mind the fun and jokes made at your expense (there are definitely plenty of jokes). As for us, we’re pretty partial to the following quotes about weed and that stoner life.

Weed and Stoner Quotes

  1. Every night is the perfect night to smoke weed.” — Unknown
  2. “Don’t worry. Don’t cry. Smoke weed and get high.” — Unknown
  3. “Why is marijuana against the law? It grows naturally upon our planet. Doesn’t the idea of making nature against the law seem to you a bit… unnatural?” — Bill Hicks
  4. “Whatever I do, I do it better stoned.” — Unknown
  5. “A friend with weed is a friend indeed, and a friend who shares is a friend who cares.” — Unknown
  6. “‎Some of my finest hours have been spent on my back veranda, smoking hemp and observing as far as my eye can see.” — Thomas Jefferson
  7. “Couples who blaze together, stay together.” — Unknown
  8. “Don’t kill my high because you’re low.” — Unknown
  9. “I have always loved marijuana. It has been a source of joy and comfort to me for many years. And I still think of it as a basic staple of life, along with beer and ice and grapefruits — and millions of Americans agree with me.” — Hunter S. Thompson
  10. “If you ever miss 4:20, just wait until 4:22. Because 4:22 is 4:20, too.” — Unknown
  11. “The biggest killer on the planet is stress, and I still think the best medicine is and always has been cannabis.” — Willie Nelson
  12. “You can’t complain when you’ve got Mary Jane.” — Unknown
  13. “When you smoke the herb, it reveals you to yourself.” — Bob Marley
  14. “Just keep something until everything makes sense or until you fall asleep.” — Unknown
  15. “If we all had a bong, we’d all get along.” — Unknown
  16. “Alcohol kills. Weed chills.” — Unknown
  17. “The illegality of cannabis is outrageous, an impediment to full utilization of a drug which helps produce the serenity and insight, sensitivity, and fellowship so desperately needed in this increasingly mad and dangerous world.” — Carl Sagan
  18. “I don’t think [pot] is more dangerous than alcohol.” — Barack Obama
  19. “A marijuana high can enhance core human mental abilities.” — Sebastian Marincolo
  20. “Struggle is the enemy, but weed is the remedy.” — Unknown
  21. “Don’t judge someone until you have shared a joint with them.” — Unknown
  22. “I find it quite ironic that the most dangerous thing about getting weed is getting caught with it.” — Bill Murray
  23. “If somebody gives me a joint, I might smoke it, but I don’t go after it.” — John Lennon
  24. “Let us burn one from end to end, and pass it over to me, my friend.” — Ben Harper
  25. “Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction.” — Bob Marley
  26. “It’s hard to be mean when you’re stoned.” — Bill Lee
  27. “You either love weed, or you’re wrong.” — Unknown
  28. “It’s CANnabis, not CAN’Tabis.” — Unknown
  29. “I smoke two joints before I smoke two joints. And then I smoke two more.” — Sublime
  30. “Breathe in, hold it, puff out, and grin.” — Unknown
  31. “I never joined high school, I joined school high.” — Unknown
  32. “A puff a day keeps the debauched attitude away.” — Unknown
  33. “It really puzzles me to see marijuana connected with narcotics… dope and all that crap. It’s a thousand times better than whiskey — it’s an assistant — a friend.” — Louis Armstrong
  34. “Smoke the marijuana and get high. Stay above the wicked and fly.” — Snoop Dogg

This article was originally published on