The 'RHONY' Hamptons Party Was Chaotic And Messy — And Viewers Loved Every Second Of It

The ‘RHONY’ women continue to get trashed in the Hamptons — and trash Ramona’s home in the process

Could an episode of the Real Housewives of New York City possibly be more hectic than the housewives’ recent wild, uninhibited visit to Joe Farrell’s 10,000 square-foot home? Somehow, the answer is yes. This week, RHONY not only set a record for number of times the women said “dildo” in one episode, but we also watched the RHONY women get completely trashed — and trash Ramona’s house in the process.

The episode opens up with the women waking up to the sound of Luann de Lesseps complaining to Ramona Singer — yet again — about sleeping in the “lower level” that apparently smelled of dog piss and had spiders raining from the ceiling. To take out her frustrations with Singer, Luann and Ramona head to the tennis court to hit a few balls with the “gorgeous,” single, 39-year-old tennis instructor — an instructor Luann wastes no time flirting with.

“This has nothing to do with tennis! Luann’s so competitive that she’s gonna completely decimate Ramona, and Ramona is gonna pretend to play tennis while she has her tits hanging out,” Dorinda explains.

After Ramona complains about grilling for her guests, the conversation on the patio turns to Luann, where she admits that she had a difficult time not drinking at the Farrell party — an admission Sonja applauds Luann for.

“The hard part is knowing you can drink and then choosing not to drink. It’s hard to be around a group of girls that like to drink. As much as I don’t want to drink, I just feel like I’d like to get back in the game with the girls,” Luann says in a talking head.

“I’m so proud of where Luann is now, that she can be open and honest with us again,” Sonja says.

But that doesn’t mean Luann doesn’t get lit — at least, “lit up like a Christmas tree,” as Sonja puts it, when the dog groomer arrives to Ramona’s house. “I’d like him to groom me,” Luann says in a talking head. We’d say, “put some ice on it, Luann,” but if she’s turning down alcohol, she might as well let the dog groomer fill her love tank.

“I think she’s getting aroused,” Sonja says mere steps away as Dog Groomer No. 2 redirects the blow dryer.

The sun has finally set, and it’s time for the party. And it isn’t a party at Ramona’s until a random guy shows up. Tonight, it’s Jeff. What do you need to know about Jeff? Well, “Jeff, he’s a character,” Ramona says with a giggle. “He actually makes a great lasagna, and he’s a very good… pianist.”

And in true RHONY fashion, the night escalates in record time.

Exhibit No. 1:

Exhibit No. 2:

“And where the hell did Sonja get that dildo?” Luann asks.

Exhibit No. 3:

Four episodes in, and the women are already topless/naked in the pool — Leah first, followed by Tinsley, and then, eventually, Sonja. “I’m seeing double and feeling single,” she says on her way to the pool. But Sonja doesn’t jump in until she tosses a few tikis, as one does.

After Dorinda “body shames” Leah for wearing a sheer top, eventually wrangling her into the bedroom to help her put on a corset, Ramona and Luann take off to another party.

The remaining very-drunk ladies then ramble on in the kitchen about last names. “You’re more powerful than your ex-husband’s last name,” Leah tells Sonja. She also suggests Tinsley lose the Mortimer name, too. “Let it go! Let it go!” Leah drunkenly screams in the kitchen as she straddles the kitchen island with one leg. “Um, maybe this is why Leah stopped drinking for a while,” Tinsley then says.

We then are subjected to watching Sonja on the toilet with the door open, a scene reminiscent of that iconic Vanderpump Rules moment featuring Tom Sandoval and Tom Schwartz in drag.

The next morning, the home is trashed, and Ramona is relatively relaxed about it all (for Ramona’s standards, at least), telling Leah, “I have to laugh or else I’ll cry.”

Same, Ramona. Same.

RHONY airs Thursdays at 9/8c on Bravo.