People Are Sharing The Most Impactful Things Their Mom Ever Said To Them

It’s pretty clear at this point that moms have an enormous impact on their children. From what we teach them to how we act, we have a heavy hand in molding who the little people we raise become — good and bad.

Now, adults are sharing the most impactful things their moms ever told them when they were children in an attempt to shed light on the best and worst things parents can vocalize to their kids.

It all started when a Reddit user hopped onto the Mommit subreddit to ask a pretty simple question about how to raise kids.

“This can be negative or positive either one, but I have 3 kids and I'm currently raising my nephew(and have my 19vy/o nephew with me) and for them, I'm really trying to learn what they might have gone through,” the poster writes. “They are in therapy and very open with me, but I just need to know both the best and worst things to say I guess. And I want to hear what mom's have said that left the most scars or brought the most joy.”

Immediately, the answers started flooding in — some with amazing pearls of advice that their moms shared and others with warning about what not to say to your children ever.

The best thing my mom said...

One of the most common responses was how important it is to tell your kids you love them.

“As a child my parents rarely and I do mean rarely ever said I love you,” reads the most upvoted comment. “I honestly don’t ever remember them telling me they loved me as a child but I assume they did. They showed very little affection towards me & would often be very annoyed if I showed any towards them. I have 3 college age daughters now and I made it my mission as a mother to always make sure they knew how much they were and are loved.”

And there are many more ways to share your love than saying, “I love you.” One person reported that their favorite mom saying was: “You were born to make me happy and you’re doing a good job.” So sweet!

“I love you every minute of every day whenever I left the house,” another shared. “Till this day I still hear her say this and I make sure and tell my daughter the same thing every day. I make sure and end every conversation with I love you so she will always feel it and know I mean it.”

Another popular response: moms who offered their support, in good times and bad.

"When you need help, no matter what you can always tell me,” wrote another responder simply. “Then I got pregnant [as a teen] and needed help and she was right, I could tell her. She was so mad and so supportive. I love her so much.”

“Positive: reassuring me that she’ll always be there for me and I can always talk to her. her actions lined up with this which made me, to this day, feel safe to talk to her about anything I need to. she never got angry with me when I had to tell her things.”

“For me, the most positive impact came from reassurance: ‘I believe in you.’ Even when I doubted myself, knowing someone else had faith in me made all the difference,” another wrote.

The worst thing my mom said...

On the negative side, multiple posters reported that their mom said really damaging things that affected their body image.

“Your stomach is hanging over your pants,” wrote one. “I’m almost 40 and still struggle with eating disorders.”

“When I was about 7 or 8 my mom told me that if my belly got any bigger, I wouldn’t be allowed to wear two-piece swimsuits anymore,” another added.

“My mom would always say, ‘A moment on the lips, forever on the hips’ anytime I ate something unhealthy,” wrote a third.

Other critical mom statements also topped the list.

“The most hurtful things weren’t always direct insults, but dismissive comments like “Stop being so sensitive,’ one person shared. “It made me feel like my emotions weren’t valid, which took years to unlearn.”

“[My mom] would make little comments like “don’t you ever stop to breathe?” Or “you know you don’t have to say EVERYTHING you think?”

“My mom called me ‘drama queen’ when I was in high school and I f-ing hated it,” another wrote. “I’m a highly sensitive person and it made me feel like my feelings weren’t valid and something was wrong with me.”

Really, it seemed like many people, in their childhoods, just needed consistent support and love instead of criticism and fear-mongering.

“I never (and I mean NEVER) heard that my parents were proud of me,” one person wrote. “I was also never told that I was enough as I am.”

“As a kid the most impactful one was, ‘you make it so difficult for me to love you,’” another added.

It feels like it’s not too hard to just tell your kids that you love them, you support them, and they are enough.