The "Broken Record Technique" Is The Parenting Hack You Need To Know Now

Sometimes, the most obvious advice can be the most mind-blowing. For me, that happened when Pediatric Therapist and Licensed Counselor, “Master” Tommy, posted a Reel on Instagram, looking to help parents battle the ever-annoying event of kids asking for the same thing over and over AKA not taking “no” for an answer.

If you’re like me, after that 10th or 11th ask, it’s easy to blow your lid, express frustration and raise your voice. Sometimes, I even get my “scary mom” face going, hoping that’ll somehow help it click into my daughter’s brain that whatever she’s asking for is not going to happen.

Apparently, I’ve been doing it all wrong. “Master” Tommy says that keeping it calm and cool during situations like this will actually yield better results.

In his video, a mom seeks advice on what to do when her own kids “keep asking for something relentlessly” that she has already said no to (Whew, so it’s not just my house)!

“A simple point would be maintain your composure, remain calm,” he says.

“If you yell at them or change your emotion, then the kid is more likely to believe that you can change your decision. We like to call it the Broken Record Technique where you just repeat yourself over and over again the same way without escalating your tone of voice.”

Master Tommy says that this method lets kids know that no matter how much they act up to get the answer they want, they will remain unchanging. When kids sense they are getting a rise out of you, they know there’s some hope you might give into what they want just to make the annoyance or frustration cease.

If they can change your emotions, they will believe they can also change your decision.

After his video gained traction, several parents chimed in with their appreciation for this advice along with other tips to help curb those incessant asks from kids.

“‘Asked and answered’ is what I would say to my kids. The first time they kept asking, but after a few days I only had to respond with it once or twice ❤️” one mom said.

Another echoed, “My favorite line is ‘you asked, I answered’ it closes the openness of the questioning in their mind. They’re seeking the answer they want but won’t acknowledge the one I gave them so they keep asking. Break it down to you asked I answered and that’s it. My other favorite for bedtime is ‘the day is done’ it seems to switch they’re brain to ‘there’s nothing left in the day time for bed.’”

One Instagram user asked, “Does stop answering and walking away okay too?”

Tommy responded, “It is more effective to address concerns through open communication rather than raising one's voice or making threats. Changing the subject can be a useful strategy, as can reminding individuals of your previous responses. However, walking away may be perceived as checking out from them. They may be seeking affirmation to feel more secure. It is important to discuss the reasons behind your decisions and help them understand your perspective. If you can. If you are about to@loose patience, yes walk away. 😂”