Moms, Unicorn Hair Is The Best Way To Show The World You're Losing Your F*cking Mind
Moms, embrace unicorn hair and let the world know if you don’t get some ‘me time’ soon you’re gonna snap
Unicorn hair — it’s not just for your nine-year-old anymore. Or for fashionable millennials you want to punch in the face. Nope. It’s for you, moms. It’s all for you.
This video is going viral today, and it’s given us the best idea: unicorn hair as a cry for help. Come on moms, wouldn’t this be effective?
What the actual hell was that? Don’t you love how they attempt to make the most complicated hairstyle in the history of ever, look like it’s a snap to pull off? But let’s ignore that, shall we? You’re going to buy a fucking styrofoam cone and a shitload of hair dye and do this. Why? Because when your family sees you, they may actually help around the house for once. Because you’re clearly losing your mind.
Your three-year-old needs to be registered for pre-k but you can’t find the time to call? You’re chaperoning your kindergartner’s first field trip tomorrow? There’s a pile of laundry so big you’re certain your kids don’t even fit into any of that shit anymore? You’re having so much anxiety you’re actually pondering giving up coffee — your lifeblood? And your family wants to eat another meal?
Sound familiar? Of course it does! You’re a mom. Your kids don’t give a shit that you’re hanging on by a thread — they still demand love, snacks, and attention all day long. And your husband’s hinting at shit you haven’t wanted to do since before several children came out of your vagina.
Unicorn hair. Let the world know they need to back the fuck off right now because you’re actually neighing like a horse.
Seriously, get your own fucking snacks, kids.
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