Parenting

From The Confessional: Sometimes Being A Mom Is Really Lonely

by Karen Johnson
Worried mother using mobile phone an laptop at home
damircudic/Getty

One of the smack-you-in the face harsh realities of motherhood is the loneliness. While some moms relish being home with their babies, for others, the SAHM life can be soul-crushingly lonely. Then, years later, those toddlers who used to crawl all over you and keep you housebound because you knew if you tried to go anywhere they’d shit themselves 3 times, become teens. And that’s a whole new level of loneliness because you can’t vent to your friends anymore as you’re sworn to secrecy by your grumpy angsty child-adults who barely talk to you.

Also, you think if you’re married or in a relationship, then surely you won’t be lonely. Nope. Even when you co-habitate with an another adult you’ve vowed to love and cherish forever, you can feel incredibly alone. Maybe they work long hours, maybe the romance is dead, or maybe parenting has just sucked everything out of both of you and there’s nothing left at the end of the day for each other.

And, to add to the mix, you barely have time or energy for friendships, yet on those exhausting days of motherhood you know you need a friend to talk to more than any other time in your life.

If you’re suffering through motherhood loneliness, read through our confessional and know that there are millions of moms out there, just like you, who are exhausted and doing their best, but just feel so alone.

Husband works 70 plus hours a week. I’m Lonely AF.

Confessional #25771999

Wish I would have known that being married and having kids doesn’t mean you won’t be lonely anymore

Confessional #25768959

I have two amazing boys, but every time I see someone announce that they’re having a girl, I get sort of depressed and it takes me a while to feel normal again. I love my boys, but I feel lonely and ostracized, especially on girls trips with my family.

Confessional #25771181

I wish I had a sibling. Being an only child is lonely.

Confessional #25781372

Grownup friendships are essential to our well-being, but they often aren’t easy to find or maintain.

I am lonely - I don't really have any friends. I know people, and highly involved in the community, but I don't have friends to hang out with. I try to socialize with my community involvement friends, but they're busy.

Confessional #25781371

DH is obsessed with moving. In 6 years of marriage, we have moved over 9 times, and 3 times between countries. I HATE moving; all the packing falls on me, plus i want to settle somewhere. I never make friends this way. Neither does DS3 :(

Confessional #25781366

I'm just so lonely, i wish I had 1 mum friend to talk to. I'm worried that my awkward loneliness is going to make my baby the awkward kid that doesn't have any friends

Confessional #25768748

During the worst time in my life, I find myself with 1 friend to talk to. I am no longer close to my siblings, my college friends or other friends I have know for a long time. Very lonely and depressing.

Confessional #25767142

You guys, I’m hurting so bad. I wish I had a scary mommy friend in real life. I’m so alone. I’m crumbling inside and nobody knows.

Confessional #25778995

When you’re doing it all without any support, that’s loneliness on a whole different level.

Single full time working parent to a 4 year old..no help..no support...lonely tired..hell....I'm all of the above. Craving alone time from my child for a little..but don't want to be ALONE. Loneliness sucks. At times I feel I'm going to lose my mind

Confessional #25770610

Lost my shit on DS8 3 times today.he is lazy inconsiderate. Single mom Feeling lonely and tired,hard to always be the disciplinarian all the time alone.trying to be a good parent, struggling now to have him be a successful thoughtful adult God willing

Confessional #25778408

So so lonely. Tired of everyone else thinking I don’t need any support.

Confessional #25768402

So many of us are just desperate for a stable home life and the happy memories we see in everyone else’s social media feed.

Everyone seems to be having amazing family time. I’m loving the time with my kids. My marriage is falling apart. I’m so so lonely.

Confessional #25780379

I feel so alone all the time. I thought we‘d SHARE a life.Now it’s more like we survive Mo-Fri and then share weekends to do chores, cleaning house, grocery shopping.Weekend over, all starts again. Anybody else feeling this lonely while never being alone?

Confessional #25776695

No one tells you how lonely life becomes after your children become teenagers. You give them all of you for years & then they become selfish twats who only want to play video games. I love them so much but I wish they were grown already.

Confessional #25775693

I know people need to get back to work and I know businesses/people have suffered so I feel bad saying this but....the stay at home orders were comforting to me as a lonely SAHM. Made me feel not so alone being at home all the time

Confessional #25780338

Moms are lonely for intimacy and for someone to desire us and tell us we’re beautiful.

I desperately need some physical intimacy. Soon to be ex-H & I haven’t had sex in 8 months, & barely before then. Even if not sex, I just need to feel a man lovingly touch my body. I’m so lonely.

Confessional #25775035

In a sexless marriage. I’m so horny but every time I maturbate I end up crying afterwards. Orgasming by myself without someone to hold me afterward makes me feel more lonely than ever. I feel like I’m never going to have sex again.

Confessional #25773674

Married 8 years, was told I was beautiful today and not by DH he never says stuff like that......makes me realize how very lonely I really am. Cant stop thinking about it.

Confessional #25770719

I'm sitting four feet away from my DH and I have never been lonelier or more alone in my life.

Confessional #25778152

Loneliness affects your mental and physical health, so if you’re suffering and need someone to talk to, reach out. Find a mom group or an online group of people with your similar interests—maybe a book club, workout group, or crafting club. Once life returns to normal, volunteer at your children’s school. Open up to your SO—chances are they’re lonely and craving connection with you too. And if you’re raising teens and suffering the isolation that comes with keeping them safe, managing their drama, and raising them up into kind, contributing adult members of society, all we can say is hang in there—this shit is hard AF and you’re doing a great job.