8 Reasons I Hate To Love Instagram

Most days, when I get a free minute, you can find me scrolling through images on my phone. I never intend for it to be a consuming task, only a mindless scroll, but then the voices in my head urge me to look at everyone’s obligatory seasonal decor shots. You know the ones they take after they clean, and before the kids get home to fuck it all up. Then outfit inspiration, then healthy food to inspire me for dinner, then cute babies in graphic tees, then my favorite celebrities…

Before I know it, I have been on the damn thing for two hours. I really do have more important things to be doing, but the time seems to fly by as I’m getting my fix. Even then, I sometimes try and put down my phone only to see I just got a new “like” on my latest post and I must check it out, see who liked it, and then skip on over to their feed, and before I know it, I am running late for something, but hey, I have a new follower.

Yes, I’m slightly embarrassed to publicly admit all this, but it is kind of my happy place. The place I retreat to when I need to suck down caffeine and get lost for a while. Funny how I didn’t have time to make those doctor’s appointments today, but I had plenty of time to obsess over other women’s shoes and vintage Pyrex collections.

There is so much deliciousness swirling around in my brain by the time I finally log out. I start to get anxiety about all the things I am now inspired to do, wear, build, and buy. I absolutely could find more productive ways to spend my time, but I probably won’t and here’s why:

1. I get to catch up with everyone.

This includes all the people I know in real life, the people I don’t know in real life but want to, and the people I stalk. I get to see their big events. If they went to New York City for the weekend, I get to drool over their pictures because my ass was stuck at home. I get to peek at their newborn baby, see the super fun date night they had, and laugh hysterically at their Pinterest project gone horribly wrong. With three kids and two dogs, I don’t get to see my friends and distant family as often as I’d like, but their pictures help me feel connected to them.

What’s even more fun is I get to brag too. Who doesn’t like to snap a picture of their house when all the kids are gone and it’s actually clean, and you bet your ass that one time I made a meal that would make Martha Stewart swoon, I posted that shit on Instagram (and all other social media platforms.)

2. The fitness motivation.

When I could use a good kick in the ass all I have to do is type in #strongwomen, #womenwholift, #Iwillkickyoass, you get the point. You got quad goals? Take it to the Gram. You want to sculpt your ass? Take it to the Gram. These women will tell you what’s up. Inspire you, motivate you, threaten you, whatever it takes.

3. It is educational.

Photography tips, how to make slime, the best way to make a bowl out of grass, the best way to make soft, chewy cookies, how to paint my nails in an argyle pattern, how to forgive my annoying neighbor for being an asshole, and how to find my G-spot. It’s all there. After 20 minutes of searching, I suddenly aspire to be a crafty sex therapist who can bake my ass off and forgive everyone who has ever wronged me #therapy. Cheap therapy.

4. It’s a great way to connect.

I have found a tribe of women on Instagram whom I love. We message each other, have proclaimed our love for one another, and are planning on meeting up somewhere between Boston and Vegas in the near future. We have never met in real life, but we have established a true friendship through those little squares.

5. The fashion.

I get to see models working the latest fashion, hairstyles, and shoes, but my favorite part is seeing hot moms rock what they love to wear. Nobody tells us what we can/can’t do. Hell yes, I will wear high heels to the supermarket on a Tuesday afternoon, and you bet your sweet ass I will take a picture of it (latte in hand, of course) and share it with the world. Because, why not?

6. The home decor.

This is where things get dicey for me. I have been known to bust out paint the second I see a cool accent wall on Instagram because I think, Hey, if they can have a black accent wall, so can I. One things leads to another, and I am suddenly trying to resist the urge to knock down a wall and order a custom hutch.

7. It’s a reprieve.

It is an escape for me. There is something soothing about scrolling through and seeing beautiful images of landscapes, or a freshly tiled floor, or a giggly baby. I can get out of my own head for awhile, and I think we all need that sometimes.

8. The humor

The funny memes on Instagram make me LOL for real. There are some funny ass people out there. Really. They will tell you all the things you wish you could say aloud, but don’t.

Some people assume Instagram makes everyone feel inadequate in some way. I refuse to feel that way. Envy hits me sometimes, so does inspiration, but I think that’s true of any outlet for our time. As far as social media goes, IG seems to be my place. I hate to love it as much as I do because I could use the time doing something else, but alas, I will keep scrolling through the beautiful homes, and family pictures, and festive celebrations instead.

And hey, I have new quad goals, fashion ideas are overflowing, my home decor game is feeling strong, and I am so full of loving, funny, inspirational quotes, I could make it until next Tuesday without going on Instagram again.

But of course, I won’t wait that long, maybe I am weak, or maybe I just fucking love Instagram and I won’t apologize for it. It’s my own personal digital inspiration board, and I am not giving it up. It is my vice, and at this point, I am too invested.