These 35 Hilarious Yoga Jokes Will Have You Laughing Ohm Loud
Finding the right yoga joke isn’t a stretch! While you don’t want to make them in the middle of a downward dog, if you make the right impression they may even help you make some yoga friendships. In fact, try some of our other jokes to keep your yoga class limber and laughing — just stay away from fart jokes!
Yoga is so much fun, and we’ve found a way to make it even more relaxing. Nothing gets you into a calmer or more positive mood than a good joke. It’s probably best not to crack these funnies during class, but your yoga instructor may appreciate it afterward. Or read a few to yourself or friends before. If you’re not a yogi, but looking for ways to destress, we have 35 ways to help. These jokes about this ancient exercise aren’t just for yoga lovers, but anyone in need of some comic relief.
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1. Why did the bagel struggle in yoga class?
It couldn’t find its center.
2. What do you call a bagel that has mastered yoga?
A pretzel.
3. Why does everyone love yoga teachers?
They bend over backwards for you.
4. What do you say at the end of a squirrel yoga class?
Nutmaste.
5. Why does the bear love yoga class?
It’s a good chance to paws and reflect.
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6. What did the dyslexic cow say in yoga class?
Oooooom.
7. How does the yogi order a pizza slice?
Make me one with everything!
8. I’m worried I’m not that good at yoga.
Some days, I feel like just a poser.
9. What does the yoga teacher want for their birthday?
All they want is your presence.
10. Why is the apple so good at yoga?
He’s got great core.
11. What did the yogi tell his dog?
Nama-stay!
12. What’s a pirate’s least favorite yoga move?
The plank pose.
13. What kind of yoga do you do in a casket?
De-compose.
14. Why is it easy to make an appointment with a yoga teacher?
They’re just so flexible.
15. Why did the yogi return the vacuum cleaner?
It came with too many attachments.
16. What do you get charged with if you kill a yoga teacher before the start of class?
Premeditated murder.
17. Why did the yogi refuse novocaine at the dentist’s?
He wanted to transcend-dental-medication!
18. What did the yogi tell his mom when she wanted to leave in the middle of yoga class?
Nah ma, stay!
19. What’s the most dangerous yoga move?
Corpse pose.
20. What kind of yogas do cadavers do?
Decom-pose.
ABC
21. People say yoga will change you life.
I think that’s a bit of a stretch.
22. What kind of yoga moves are popular at nudist yoga?
Over-ex-poses.
23. What does the yogi say when she gets electrocuted?
Ohmmmmmm!
24. What did the yoga teacher say when her friend asked her to leave the party?
Nah, Imma stay.
25. I didn’t believe yoga would fix my posture…
But I stand corrected.
26. I’ve been practicing yoga for decades.
It’s been a long stretch.
27. My yoga teacher was drunk yesterday.
He put me in a really awkward position.
28. What kind of car is the best at yoga?
Mercedes Bends.
29. I tried to get my grandpa to go to yoga class yesterday…
It was a bit of a stretch.
30. My doctor doesn’t want me to go to yoga anymore.
He thinks I self-meditate too much.
31. How do you know when a yoga teacher is angry?
He gets incensed.
32. Knock knock!
Who’s there? Yoga. Yoga who? Yoga to try this, it feels amazing.
33. What did the yoga teacher say when she performed a citizen’s arrest?
You’ve got the right to remain silent!
34. What does the job ad on the door of the yoga studio say?
Inquire within.
35. Why did the yogi get fired from her job as a cashier?
Because she kept saying change comes from within.
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