Unicorn Toilet Paper Is A Thing That Exists And We Need It Immediately

For the low price of $5, you too can have unicorn toilet paper in your bathroom

Parenting largely revolves around two things: spending your money on boring stuff and poop. Well why not improve both those pitfalls with unicorn toilet paper?

Yes, this is a thing that exists, and to be quite honest, I’m not sure how I’ve gone all this time without it. Unicorn toilet paper is the bathroom/life upgrade parents need to make everything a little more bearable. You have to spend your money on stupid toilet paper that literally gets flushed anyway, so why not make it whimsical AF?

LOOK HOW CUTE. Honestly, I’d drape this stuff all over my house in addition to letting my family wipe their butts with it.

This glorious product comes to us courtesy of European tech site Get Digital, and before you froth yourself into a magical panic, yes, they will ship their unicorn TP to the U.S., a fact that gives me more relief than it should for a person my age. I’m kind of alarmed by how much I desperately want this stuff in my bathroom, guys.

“On the 200 sheets each roll holds, fluffy unicorns are prancing over rainbows. Do we need to say more?” the description reads. Nope. They don’t. My credit card is out and for just $5 a roll, I’m considering this a bargain for the joy it will bring me.

If your kids are going to unravel entire rolls of toilet paper and clog your plumbing anyway, it might as well be beautiful and covered in rainbows, right? Right. “Now, you can bring friendship and magic into your bathroom!” the site reads.

And what other place deserves magic more than the porcelain throne?

Rest assured, they’ve thought of everything. The rainbows and unicorns are printed with food-grade coloring and are “skin friendly,” so no need to worry about a whimsically rashy bum. And the wiping process promises to be quite the experience. “Some people even say that one can occasionally feel the soft fur of a unicorn,” they write.

SOLD.