To The Halftime Show Haters: Take A Seat

During the Super Bowl’s halftime show, I watched in awe as JLo and Shakira twerked their amazing asses. They didn’t disappoint and left me wanting more. It was the hottest thing I’d ever seen — two mothers over 40 who were kicking ass. They owned that stage, did what they wanted, and I’ve watched it (with my 14-year-old daughter) at least ten times since the live performance.

Of course, I knew there would be people who’d have a problem with two women on stage in outfits hotter than 10,000 suns with dance moves that were strong and made a statement — dance moves which included a pole. Hell yes.

I’m here to say, I don’t have patience for negativity or judgment.

First, about that pole… knock if off with the stripper pole comments. Pole dancing is empowering. It’s a sign of strength, hard work, and athleticism. Shakira and JLo are so inspirational to me as a mother to three in her 40s. I’ve always wanted to take a pole dancing class because it would make me feel amazing and strong. Those of you who think these women were on the stage solely to turn on your husbands, obviously don’t know the feeling of empowerment. Also, you are just plain wrong.

It’s obvious you are threatened by their performance since you can’t wrap your mind around the fact that a woman should be able to wear what she wants, move how she wants, and touch herself how she wants. After all, it’s her body and her choice. Everyone should feel free to make autonomous decisions, regardless of fame or age, without your shame.

If they would have just stood there singing, you’d complain that it was boring. Adam Levine performed shirtless last year, and I missed the collective outrage. It seemed like everyone agreed he was attractive.

So, let’s call this what it is: sexism and internalized misogyny.

I mean, don’t you have other things to do? Like look in the mirror and ask yourself why you feel the need to blast other women. That would be a good start.

What you wear, how you move, and the way you choose to carry yourself has nothing to do with how much you respect yourself. People have been getting that confused for too damn long and it’s time to realize women can do what they want.

That’s what I’m teaching my kids and I suggest you do the same, instead of being so quick to hop on your soap box and declare that these two Latina women are not “family-friendly” and “overly sexualizing” themselves. Our clothes and bodies do not define our character. Teach your kids to respect art and amazing women, because that’s what they saw at the halftime show.

Please, take a seat. Or a pole dancing class.

It’s not your job to say who should wear what unless you’re trying to look like an ignorant asshole and teach the young women of the world they should be ashamed for wanting to show their beautiful skin or dance in a certain way.

No one had a problem with Adam Levine’s Super Bowl performance last year — a male singer who wore his pants low and ripped off his shirt. For that show, you were all, “Oooh, how can I get me some of that?” And “best halftime show ever.” And “I can’t drop trou fast enough.”

But as soon as two women get up there, two women who have birthed children — one in her 50s and one in her 40s (yes, I know I already mentioned this but it bears repeating) — some folks clutch their pearls. People say it should be a child-friendly half time show. They say these women are inappropriate. They shudder to think of the example they are setting for their babies.

But what about the example of you being a judgmental asshole? Your kids are watching that too and are here to listen to all your ignorant comments. And it’s unfortunate.

As a mom-to-three in my 40s, Shakira and JLo are inspirational AF. They are strong and confident and motivating. I mean, did you see J.Lo climb that pole? If you say you don’t have fantasies of being able to do that, whether it’s for a performance, or just for yourself, you are a lying-liar face.

Really, I didn’t think being too sexy was a thing, but then again I don’t sit in judgment clasping my cheeks and shielding my kids’ eyes to save them for the horror known as two woman dancing on a stage celebrating where they came from.

No, I see those women out there killing it and it makes me feel alive. Like, if they can do that I can certainly take that salsa dancing class without spraining my ankle and write that book I keep meaning to work on.

They showed us you are allowed to be yourself — that means wearing what you want, dancing how you want, and touching yourself how you want, because that is your right as a person.

To all the haters of the halftime show, go ahead and keep it up with your miserable thoughts and negative comments about these women being “too sexual.” Just remember to be accountable because you are shaming other women. Which do you think is more damaging?

As for me, I’ll be over here heating up leftover queso and perfecting my twerk because it’s freaking 2020 and liberating as hell to be an multifaceted woman.