60+ Riverdale Quotes That Prove This Is The CW's Best (And Most Dramatic) Show

In its truly dramatic and captivating five seasons (so far), The CW’s Riverdale has garnered a ton of love — and, OK, a fair amount of hate, too. Many critics have taken issue with the show’s overly dramatic plotlines. But we have a slightly different outlook. Riverdale, first and foremost, is a show about teenagers based on a comic book… about teenagers. It’s also on The CW, which caters primarily to, you guessed it, teenagers. What the crap kind of dialogue do these people want? If you crave Aaron Sorkin-esque wit at Amy Sherman-Palladino’s Gilmore Girls speed, you’re probably barking up the wrong TV show tree. If you’re looking for some guilty pleasure high school histrionics, though, Riverdale is where you head. And to make it even simpler for you, we went ahead and compiled some of the best Riverdale quotes right here.

Granted, it’s like high school with the melodrama pumped up by 1000 percent. But still. There’s a lot to love: the thick-and-thin friendship of Beronica (Betty and Veronica, for the noobs); the “together forever,” “stuff of fairy tales” romance of Bughead (Betty and Jughead); KJ Apa as Archie. Plus, the show is relatable. Didn’t you think you’d be tight with your BFF for all eternity? Were you convinced at one point you’d marry your high school sweetheart? Sure you were — people probably even rooted for you.

Riverdale‘s no different. It’s the perfect high school microcosm. There are mean girls. Idealism. Some creepy mysteries. All of which make Riverdale a wildly enjoyable show. And you know what? We honestly love the dialogue. There are, of course, laughable moments of Schitt’s Creek-level absurdity. And we’d be remiss not to mention the sad, manic high school-ness of it all. But there are no cheesy superheroes and very few scary monsters in a parallel universe when you watch the show. That makes it the perfect show to scare away boredom. These Riverdale quotes? They’re just some of the binge-worthy moments you can witness when you watch Archie, Jughead, Veronica, and Betty, and friends. So why not give it a go?

Best Riverdale Quotes

Archie Andrews Quotes

1. “I feel like the prettiest girl at the dance.”
2. “Ronnie, when will you learn? You are, now and forever, the only girl for me.”
3. “You can’t go through life trying not to get hurt.”
4. “I was born alone. I’ll die alone. I’ll sing alone. I’ll be OK.”
5. “Don’t underestimate her. And don’t bet against her.”
6. “From now on, we’re protecting our own.”
7. (To Fred) “And I kinda started imagining what we would’ve talked about at Pop’s this morning if things hadn’t gone to hell. You would’ve asked me about Veronica. I would’ve told you how crazy I am about her.”
8. “When I’m with Veronica, as dark as things get — and they’ve been getting pretty dark — she makes me feel like everything is gonna be fine. She makes things fun. I don’t wanna lose that.”
9. “I don’t know how to do this… to just pretend like everything’s the same as it was before.”
10. “I fought. Every day. I didn’t stop fighting. I fought for my life.”
11. “We will find you, we will hunt you, and we will end you.”

Veronica Lodge Quotes

1. “You may be a stock character from a ’90s teen movie, but I’m not.”
2. “Betty and I come as a matching set. You want one; you take us both.”
3. “I don’t follow rules; I make them. And when necessary, I break them.”
4. “If the Manolo Blahnik fits.”
5. “You wouldn’t be the first mobster to see a therapist, Daddy.”
6. “You ever seen what happens to a snake when a Louboutin heel steps on it? Keep talking, and you’ll find out.”
7. “You wanted fire? Sorry, Cheryl Bombshell, my specialty is ice.”
8. “I’m Breakfast at Tiffany’s, but this place is strictly In Cold Blood.”
9. “We’re endgame, Archie.”
10. “As hot and smart as you are, you should be the Queen Bey of this drab hive.”
11. “Thank you for mansplaining my business to me.”

Betty Cooper Quotes

1. “Who would’ve thought, at the beginning of the year, that we would all become great friends?”
2. “I do everything for everyone. Everything to be perfect. The perfect daughter, the perfect sister, the perfect student. Can’t I do this one thing for me?”
3. “I’m not gonna stop until I prove it.”
4. “What do we do now that Cheryl’s gone full Poison Ivy?”
5. “It’s like, you know, how in a time of crisis, people either come together or fall apart? It feels like we’re falling apart.”
6. “We’re both so lucky. I mean, don’t you think? To have found the people that we’re meant to be with?”
7. “Maybe not every murderer is guilty, and maybe not every victim is innocent. Maybe it’s not all black and white.”
8. “I know everyone grieves differently, but Cheryl’s hosting a pop rally to cope with her loss. That’s either brilliant, or psychotic, or both.”
9. “What, Mom? What does some guru who’s running a Heaven’s Gate commune for pregnant runaways and wives of serial killers have to say about my diaries?”
10. “Oolong milk and wanting to burn my diaries is helping you get over the fact that Dad murdered four people and tried to kill us? If you genuinely believe that, you are in denial, Mom.”

Jughead Jones Quotes

1. “We’re not gonna hug in front of this whole town. So, why don’t we just both do that bro thing where we nod like douches and mutually suppress our emotions.”
2. “I’m not normal. I’m not wired to be normal.”
3. “Doesn’t it ever occur to you how different we are, like on a cellular level?”
4. “I don’t fit in. And I don’t wanna fit in.”
5. “In case you haven’t noticed, I’m weird. I’m a weirdo.”
6. “That’s the common misconception about fairy tales. They very rarely have a happy ending.”
7. “Fear. It’s the most basic, the most human emotion. As kids, we’re afraid of everything. The dark. The boogeyman under the bed. And we pray for morning. For the monsters to go away. Though they never do. Not really.”
8. “What? Sardonic humor is just my way of relating to the world.”
9. “The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, especially not when there’s a snake curled up in its limbs.”
10. “I self identify as a loner.”
11. “Do you think I could use Jason Blossom’s death as an excuse to get out of PE?”
12. “They’re parents. They’re all crazy.”

Cheryl Blossom Quotes

1. “Wanna team up for a little destruction?”
2. “Listen up, fives. A 10 is speaking.”
3. “You’ve got the vocabulary of a baked potato.”
4. “I think she’s crazier than a serial killer on bath salts.”
5. “I’m in the mood for chaos.”
6. “If you breathe, it’s because I give you air.”
7. “Hands off, goblin!”
8. “I need girls with fire on my squad.”
9. “Sorry to interrupt the sad breakfast club.”
10. “You mean True Detective?”

Kevin Keller Quotes

1. “You live in this pale pink world of milkshakes and first kisses.”
2. “Is cheerleading still a thing?”
3. “What was it like before she got here? I honestly cannot remember.”
4. “In real life, what you see is what you get.”
5. “Actually, to clarify, Betty and Archie aren’t dating, but they are endgame.”
6. “If you can’t accept what I do, whatever I do, then we’re just… we’re not really friends.”
7. “Betty’s ponytail is iconic and beyond reproach.”
8. “I mean, I am devastatingly handsome in that classic pre-accident Montgomery Clift kind of way.”
9. “Are we 100 percent sure that Archie’s straight? Because no straight man has that body.”
10. “Let the fan fiction begin.”
11. “Actually, to clarify, Betty and Archie aren’t dating, but they are endgame.”
12. “If you can’t accept what I do, whatever I do, then we’re just, we’re not really friends.”