I Froze My Eggs & I Don't Know How Or When To Use Them

I’m not saying I started the trend, but I was definitely the first of my friends to freeze my eggs. At 33, freshly out of a relationship and in full-on panic mode, I felt like my whole future had been mapped out... until it wasn’t. My timeline for marriage, kids, and everything in between was suddenly up in the air. So, egg freezing became my safety net. And I got lucky — my job covered the cost of the procedure (though, with most companies, that’s still rare). It felt like a no-brainer.

Around the same time, I met my now-husband. And ladies, if you meet a guy who’s cool with you freezing your eggs — and even more so, supportive of it — he’s a keeper.

Fast-forward a few years, and now, at almost 40, I have a 2-year-old son I conceived naturally. I’ve been dragging my feet on trying for a second child, partly because the last time around was such an emotional rollercoaster, and life feels pretty manageable at the moment. However, I know it’s something I ultimately want.

Two months ago, I ditched my birth control, bought a thermometer that pairs with the Natural Cycles app, and began charting my fertility. But I’ll be honest: Trying for baby number two isn’t as thrilling as the first time. We’re older and more exhausted, and the pressure for it to happen quickly feels more extreme. So, with 16 frozen eggs sitting on ice, I’ve been wondering — how are they? Do they miss me? But more seriously, how and when do I actually use them?

To get some clarity, I reached out to three fertility experts, all board-certified in obstetrics/gynecology and reproductive endocrinology, to gain some insight into what it takes to get pregnant with frozen eggs.

What is the egg-freezing process like?

As a refresher (and because mom brain is real!), I spoke with Dr. Angeline N. Beltsos to break down the egg-freezing process. She explained that the first step is determining your egg reserve, which involves testing two hormones: AMH (for egg count) and FSH (for egg quality). An ultrasound is also used to check how many visible eggs there are. "After assessing this and comparing it to the woman's age, we can estimate how many eggs are needed to give her a good chance of having a baby," Beltsos shares. "Typically, 15 eggs in younger women give about a 70% chance of success." (Here's a useful tool to estimate your chances of a live birth from frozen eggs.)

The egg-freezing process involves two weeks of hormone injections to stimulate the ovaries, followed by a "trigger shot" to help the eggs mature. The final step is egg retrieval, done under anesthesia. "We use a vaginal ultrasound with a tiny needle to collect the eggs into a test tube," she says. In the words of Celine Dion, "It's all coming back to me now."

Step one: check. But what about step two? Is it time? I asked Dr. Alexis Greene when I should consider using my frozen eggs. She explained that the timing is patient-dependent, but generally, women over 35 should consult a fertility doctor after six months of trying to conceive without success. "Unless you have known fertility issues or irregular cycles, that's when you'd want to come in," Greene advises.

Dr. Carrie Wambach, who froze my eggs in 2019, echoed this advice. "You got pregnant easily two years ago and don't have any high-risk conditions. Try for three to six months, and if you're not pregnant, we'll thaw your eggs." Perfect — an actionable game plan!

Wambach also shared some sobering stats. At my age (39), the chance of conceiving naturally each month is just 8-10%. However, at age 25, it's still only about 25%. Using my 33-year-old eggs to create embryos and genetically testing them increases my odds of pregnancy to 60-65%.

A topic that came up during these conversations was miscarriage. Wambach pointed out that the risk of miscarriage after age 40 is about 40-50%. But if I use my 33-year-old eggs to create embryos that are genetically tested, that risk drops to below 10%. Beltsos added that younger eggs are less likely to result in miscarriage or genetic conditions like Down syndrome. “When embryos are abnormal, they often don’t implant, and if they do, most will miscarry, preventing us from having a baby with issues,” she explains. “With age comes a higher risk of miscarriage.”

Lastly, the question of if I wanted an additional child came up. If I were to want a third, the doctors all suggested trying a bit longer on my own to conceive naturally. Props to any parents of three, but that does not interest me!

I want to use my eggs. Now what?

I'd make an appointment at the fertility clinic and come in with my husband. We would have to make sure our genetic carrier test is up to date (we did this for our first child), my husband would do a semen analysis, and we would test for infectious disease. A specialized ultrasound is done to check the uterus to make sure it is in a good place to have an embryo implanted.

Next, we would choose a thaw date. I would likely plan to thaw all of the eggs and create embryos. However, some people may decide to fertilize only a few eggs for religious or political reasons, as they may have concerns about creating extra embryos.

The eggs would be thawed and fertilized in the lab. Greene explains, "Not every egg will survive the thaw, and not every egg will fertilize." Dr. Beltsos adds, "Of the mature eggs that survive, about 70% will fertilize and become embryos. Half of those will develop into day-five embryos, but not all will result in a pregnancy." As with everything in life, there are no guarantees.

Many people opt for genetic testing to screen for chromosomal abnormalities once the embryo reaches day five or six. This is the same testing you can do once you're pregnant, but knowing beforehand is obviously better. Even though my eggs were 33, I'd likely still test them for peace of mind.  Once a healthy embryo is found, it's time to prepare the body for implantation.

This involves a month of hormone therapy. Wambach described two options: a medicated cycle or a natural one. In a medicated cycle, you take estrogen pills followed by progesterone shots. In a natural cycle, you visit the clinic frequently to track ovulation, then take vaginal progesterone and have the embryo implanted six days later (this is only for those with regular cycles and the ability to visit the clinic often).

I asked if implantation is like egg retrieval, and thankfully, it's much more chill (my words, not the doctors'). Wambach clarifies, "Most patients take Valium and come in with a full bladder. The procedure is similar to a Pap smear — we insert a speculum and a tiny catheter into the uterus. Most people don't feel it, and you watch the embryo being implanted via ultrasound."

So, what’s my next move?

For me, a sigh of relief! I feel good about my chances for a healthy pregnancy. Since we got pregnant quickly with our first, we'll try the old-fashioned way a bit longer. I'm not a glass-half-empty person, but I'll be realistic — if I do get pregnant naturally, I know there's still a chance of miscarriage. And money plays a role here, too. Since I'm not diagnosed with infertility, I'm holding off for now. The silver lining? In 2025, California will mandate that large-group health plans cover infertility treatments. (You can check if your state is on board here.)