Parenting

Why I Absolutely Refuse To Make New Year's Resolutions

by Katie Bingham-Smith
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Originally Published: 
Iya Forbes/Getty

I used to set New Year’s Resolutions each year, and guess what? I never did them. Like, not even for a week.

It was as if I thought I had to make them because it was the thing to do. You know, all the “new year, new me” talk can be contagious — but there are a lot of us who don’t follow through, then we are mad at ourselves.

I stopped setting these resolutions for myself when my kids were small; suddenly they didn’t mean a thing to me. But more than that, I realized if there was something I really wanted to do in my life, I could pick any day to do it.

It took the pressure off of waiting until one day out of the year to try and transform and become this unrealistic version of myself.

But you know what else happened? I became much more productive working on myself, and kicking habits I wanted to ditch, when I chipped away at it a bit at a time.

I started running in the fall, something I’d always wanted to do.

Then there was the summer I learned how to sew and knit.

None of these were New Year’s resolutions, but they have all been things I’ve wanted to do for myself.

The older I get, the more I realize you have to wait until you are ready to do something or you just won’t do it whether you set the intention or not. Readiness is key to making real changes — not some specific date on the calendar.

I could have made this long list of things I wanted to try and tucked them away until the next new year, but the mere thought of trying to change that much simply because the calendar changes exhausts me.

Winter is a time when I’m very unmotivated. Throw in a month’s worth of eating Christmas cookies, and shopping myself into oblivion, and there’s no way I am going to start something new or give up something that might not be that great for me. I’m setting myself up for failure if I try, and I know it.

After a major holiday is not the time for transformation. Unless of course you work better under pressure and feel extra motivated after turkey, taters, and pants that feel too tight.

What I am trying to say is this: Take the pressure off of trying to set New Year’s resolutions if it’s not your thing. Oftentimes it feels like a chore. We are really good about the changes for a few weeks then we fizzle. What’s left is a guilt hangover, berating ourselves because we “can’t even stick to a resolution.”

It seems contrary at first glance, especially if you’re used to setting goals for the new year — but letting go of my resolutions was the best thing I could have done for my self-evolvement.

Instead of waiting until January 1st, do something, or quit something, when you are ready. You can set the date, or you can start out of the blue. It doesn’t matter what day of the year it is. We all know time is going to pass anyway.

This is your PSA to ditch those resolutions if they aren’t doing a thing for you. Coming from someone who struggled with it for years, I highly recommend it.

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