Here’s Your Reminder That You Can — And Should — Decenter Your Parents
“You can love your parents and still disappoint them when you don't do the things they want you to do.”
It can be easy to let your parents’ opinions influence your life, whether you fully realize it or not. Yes, even when you have kids of your own — after all, the little voice in the back of your head probably learned a thing or two from the people that raised you.
That’s why “Mindset Mentress” Niki Kay is here to tell you that you are allowed to set boundaries with your parents — and, it doesn’t mean you love them any less.
“I don't know who needs to hear this, but you can love your parents and still tell them no. You can love your parents and still have different point of views,” Kay said in an Instagram Reel.
“You can love your parents and still disappoint them when you don't do the things they want you to do,” she continued.
Yes, eldest daughters, you heard her right: you can disappoint your parents! How freeing!
“We need to reframe how we show up for our parents, love our parents and respect them,” Kay continued. “Wanting space for yourself doesn't mean that you're selfish, taking decisions for your life and for your well being doesn't mean you're a bad son or a bad daughter, and doing things your way that doesn't necessarily agree with their vision for your life, doesn't mean you're a bad person.”
We’ll call that a free therapy session.
The comment section was all for Kay’s take.
“Yesss! I never understand when people say they “can’t” do something because their parents won’t let them.. like you’re an adult, just do it,” one user said. “Your life won’t change until YOU change it.”
“They’ve lived their lives (whether they *knew* they had a choice to live it that way or not) and it’s time for you to live yours,” said another.
Although, a few users pointed out that they might not have been the right audience.
“I know who needs to hear this- my emotionally immature parents 😂” one user said.
Perhaps the parents that need to hear this out there could benefit from a quick share of Kay’s video. But, for their children, I would imagine Kay would suggest setting boundaries whether they understand your need to or not. We’re decentering their opinions, remember?
