This Parenting Coach Has Some Key Advice On How To Deal With Your Kid's Bad Attitude
This is a pretty hot take.
When kids bring attitude, it can be hard to not reciprocate or immediately reprimand, but is this the best way to approach our kids’ bad mood? One parenting coach, Lisa Bunnage, says definitely not!
“You always ignore attitude. You never address it unless they swear or call you names,” Bunnage says.
“Name calling and swearing can go on a behavior board. But other than that, yeah, you just ignore attitude. You can't address it. Their bad attitude will naturally go away once you're a leader. It's the last thing that disappears organically by itself once they respect you. There's no point in having an attitude with someone that you look up to. You become like a mentor, someone that they look up to and want to please. And then when they're teenagers, you want to pass that leadership torch over to them a little bit more, but they still respect you.”
She also notes that in order to gain that respect from your kids, you need to also give that respect back.
“You give respect to get it. So yeah, attitude, there's no point in addressing it. They're allowed to have an attitude. That's okay. It's in the personality sort of department, but the attitude will go away eventually once you learn how to be a good leader. It's the very last thing that goes away and it will happen organically. You can't force it.”
After her video gained traction, several parents commented on Bunnage’s advice.
Some TikTok users were not so keen on this advice, saying that a tween or teen’s attitude needs to be nipped in the bud immediately.
“Disagree. Disrespect not dealt with when little will continue as teenagers and bleed over into relationships with teachers and employers,” one user wrote.
“As a non-parent on parent tiktok, I feel like there is no way right? Attitude isn’t always given out of a need for a reaction thus not reacting doesn’t have any effect?” another questioned.
Another user said, “But attitudes become disrespectful and hurt others feelings, like smaller children in the home”
However, several TikTok users thanked Bunnage for her advice, noting that they agreed with her opinion on attitude and kids.
Another said “Thank you!! You are so right and it’s the hardest thing to do but we can see how disregulated we are as adults and then expect our kids to be different. Kids need role models 💯💯💯”
"‘They're allowed to have an attitude’...I want to scream this to adults who give me the sideye when I let my littles express their attitudes,” another wrote.
While this may be a hard parenting change to make, there is some merit to this. It’s hard to not take your kid’s attitude personally, but there seem to be some lasting changes (for the better) that could really help shape your child’s future.
