Bitsie Tulloch Opens Up About The Realities Of Being A Mom Who Also Plays One On TV

Bitsie Tulloch, one-half of the eponymous starring duo of the hit CW series Superman & Lois, dials into our interview a few minutes late for a reason I — and presumably just about every other mom on the planet — can totally understand. Her daughter, Vivian, got hurt on the playground at school, so Tulloch called me in the middle of her day’s impromptu pivot.

She’s apologetic (unnecessary, of course) and promises me she’s still cool with keeping our call (Vivian is OK... “she’s a tough cookie,” and Tulloch plans to treat her to pizza to perk her up). It’s in that moment that I hate myself a little for thinking a cliche I’m sure Tulloch has heard more than once since she stepped into the role of Lois Lane: She may be married to the Man of Steel onscreen, but she’s a supermom in real life.

As I chat with Tulloch, a clearer picture comes into focus. Do I still think she’s an incredible mom who balances a demanding career with being a very present parent? Absolutely. But am I also reminded that even superheroes get help, and that help is part of what makes them so extraordinary? Also yes. Tulloch is quick to credit the people in her world who make it possible for her to be present when she’s on set and when she’s at home.

Just ahead of the Season 4 premiere of Superman & Lois, Tulloch opened up to me about saying goodbye to her iconic character, what she and her husband, Grimm costar David Giuntoli, are currently streaming, and how their family is taking full advantage of time together right now.

Warning: This interview contains plot points relevant to Superman & Lois.

Scary Mommy: Here at the precipice of the show’s final season, what do you feel has been the most rewarding thing about playing such a beloved character?

Bitsie Tulloch: Being able to have an impact and put my stamp on a character that has been so iconic for over 85 years ... This is the first iteration we've seen of Lois Lane as a mother, going through everything that working moms have to go through when their interests are torn between her being a journalist and pursuing the truth, and then dealing with hormonal teenagers at home and sometimes neglecting them by accident. It’s just been a really interesting spin on Lois Lane and her strength — we've had so many moments where the boys get themselves into trouble, and she kicks into mama bear mode.

It's been really very much an honor. I'm sad that the show is ending, but it was an honor to play her for these four seasons. And now, I get to pass the baton to Rachel Brosnahan.

SM: It’s been very cool to see your iteration of Lois because this is a character we’re all familiar with, but your version feels like we’re really getting to know her as a person.

BT: Yeah, and the breast cancer storyline, while I was initially worried about it and how the fans would respond to it, [they] really loved it. I think it's just because cancer is unfortunately so pervasive ... I'll go to Comic-Cons, and people will come up to me crying and just say, Thank you for that, because I lost my sister or my aunt or my mother, or my wife is a survivor. And I think making such a real and grounded story, kudos to the writers for allowing me and trusting me with such heavy material and something that does affect so many people in their lives.

SM: Lois still has cancer coming into this season, but Superman is apparently dead? What does that look like?

BT: The way we wrapped it up, there's no way anyone's going to watch our series finale without crying. It's like, I dare you to watch it and not cry. It's very emotional, especially the first three episodes. And in my opinion, in episode 3, which my husband David Giuntoli directed, it really comes to a peak.

Like you said, the writers have delivered a very relatable and grounded version of Lois and Clark, and I think that's why people like the show so much — they felt like they could be their neighbors. There was such an emphasis on the family aspect as opposed to just hitting the superhero aspect so hard.

SM: David starred in one of my favorite shows of the last few years, A Million Little Things, which also had a very emotional last few seasons. When you stream movies or TV shows together, do you go straight for comedy for a little levity?

BT: No, actually he hadn’t seen Succession, so we’re watching it. He’s watching it for the first time, and we’re in Season 4 — we just saw Connor’s wedding, so that was that big reveal. I don’t want to spoil it for anyone who hasn’t seen Succession. Then we’re probably going to watch The Bear. But it really depends. What we'll watch together is good acting, and now that he's getting into directing, he's really interested in watching good directing.

He's an incredibly involved father ... he takes her to school, picks her up, he takes her to the doctor's appointments, the dentist appointments. And I'm not a morning person, so I'm happy to let him take her to school. But I think for him, his heart just kind of exploded when he had a baby girl. I am sure that's really allowed him to open up because he had a very vulnerable storyline, of course, on A Million Little Things. I probably, as an actor, lean more towards the way I was trained, which is Stella Adler, which is Lois Howard.

SM: So many Superman & Lois fans compare you and costar Tyler Hoechlin to Margot Kidder and Chris Reeve, which I imagine is just the highest compliment. If you were going to step into another nostalgic role in the future, whose shoes would you love to try on for size?

BT: I think something with Jane Austin would be very, very fun. Because we're watching Succession, I was just talking about how amazing Matthew Macfadyen is in Pride & Prejudice with Keira Knightley.

And we are very excited ... I’m sure you guys are aware of the podcast Circle Round for kids? David and I reached out to Rebecca Sheir, who's the host, and David and I did an episode together that will premiere on Tuesday, Oct. 8.

SM: Oh, fun!

BT: Yeah, our daughter's obsessed with Circle Round, and it's always great to have her be interested in something that isn't a screen. Every night, she gets to listen to a Circle Round episode as she's falling asleep. So, I was really stoked that they had us on. And David does voiceover. He's actually the voice of Batman in a few of DC’s animated movies, so it's always sort of amused me that I'm married to Superman and Batman.

SM: You are literally living the dream.

BT: Yeah. I can't complain.

SM: Since we’re in spooky season, do you guys go big for Halloween?

BT: No, because we're not in a neighborhood where anybody trick-or-treats, unfortunately. So, we'll go out, but we don't really do it. My daughter did decide — and this will likely change three or four times in the next month — a couple of days ago that she wanted to be a Christmas tree because that's her favorite holiday.

But no, we go huge for Christmas ... If we were in an area where kids actually visited and trick-or-treated, I would decorate the yard and everything, but we're not.

SM: A Christmas tree might be my new favorite Halloween costume idea.

BT: Yeah, it'd be cute.

SM: Vivian’s 5?

BT: Yeah, she's 5 1/2. She started kindergarten about a month ago.

SM: Such a fun age but also a very busy age. What's your secret for just being really intentional with your time as a mom?

BT: The reality is David and I, with our careers, have been really reliant on childcare and nannies because, as actors, we don't have 9-to-5 jobs, and I couldn't stay at home with her because I was working so much.

Sometimes, they're shooting 15, 16 hour days, and as a lead on a show, I would sometimes go days without even seeing her ... I would be up and out the door before she would wake up, and I would get home at 10 or 11, and she'd already be asleep. So, I'd be sneaking into her room just smelling her and giving her little kisses, knowing that there was certainly no resentment or anything on her part.

SM: Aw, yeah. It’s amazing how adaptable kids are.

BT: It was a struggle the first few years on the show; because of COVID, we weren't allowed to have visitors. Not only was I not seeing much of her, but she couldn't even come to visit me in my trailer. Then, in Season 3, they allowed visitors, and our nanny would bring her to my trailer, so I would go shoot a scene, run out to hang out with her and have lunch with her, and then they would take off.

Season 4 was the first time, actually, the very first time she was on set at all watching me work was when David was directing. And it was a day when Tyler and I had a sort of lovey-dovey scene, so she was kind of like, ‘Wait a minute, Daddy's over there directing, Mommy's over there holding Tyler's hand, but OK.’ She kind of rolled with it. It was pretty cute.

I did a movie right after Superman & Lois wrapped, but with her transitioning into kindergarten, it's been pretty great, just really for the first time in five years, getting to spend a ton of time with her ... Since the hours actors work are so tough, I think David and I are both really relishing it. He takes her out to dinner about once a week on a little daddy-daughter date. It's adorable.

This interview has been edited for length and clarity.