Man Caught On Camera Licking Doorbell For 3 Hours And The Internet's Losing It

California man caught on home security camera licking a doorbell for three hours

You know times are tough when people are positively delighted to hear that a man spent three hours in the dark licking a stranger’s doorbell — and that it was caught on video.

PS — “licking a doorbell” is not a euphemism in this totally weird story.

The A&E series Live PD shared the extremely WTF footage of suspect Roberto Daniel Arroyo literally licking a damn doorbell — for three hours.

Arroyo came upon the Salina, CA home in the early morning hours and apparently had some…urges? Let’s just get straight to the point — the dude was seductively licking a doorbell, staring right into the camera, and we have no idea why. But we do know that it caused a complete avalanche of amazing Facebook comments.

First, there was this timely remark.

But a few folks were just feeling a bit thirsty.

OK, this is going too far, we’ve had enough interneting for one day.

It produced a few solid dad jokes, though.

And an enterprising wife weighed in.

WHY.

The future has truly robbed us of so much.

I just…I give up.

Homeowner Sylvia Dungan posted her own reaction about the hilarious, if disturbing, footage to her Twitter account.

“We had just installed our Ring doorbell just less than a month ago. It paid off. Our home is the doorbell that was featured on #LivePD, 1/05/19 episode. So funny. It was great. Should I remove my sign (over perp’s right shoulder)? I’m embarrassed for his family,” she writes.

She shared a few videos of him doing other weird stuff during his time spent at their home along with a note about how the family was initially upset, but soon came to see the humor in the odd situation. KION News also reports that the man spent some time urinating on the family’s property. Lovely.

Like, what the entire hell is going on here?

We may never know, but the comments will forever live in gloriously hilarious infamy.