I Need a Vacation...Alone.
  • ABCABC
    Posts: 4,100Member

    I really need a getaway.  Ok, maybe not far away.  I'd settle for a hotel down the street.  What I want is one whole day/night to myself.  No requests, no expectations, no nagging, no begging, no "to-do" lists, no nothing.  I just need a day filled with full-body massages, pedicure, manicure, facial, hair done, waxing, wine, chocolates, spa sounds, delicious food, and a comfy bed to SLEEP.  Is this too much to ask? Why, of course it is.  There are several things wrong with this scenario. One, I have issues with leaving my dh and dd at home without me being there to manage them.  They just do not respect my expectations for keeping the house in order; something about "put it away when you're done" and "clean up after yourselves" doesn't click.  So that means I'd come home and be more stressed than when I left. Another reason I can't is because I'll feel guilty.  Not that I probably don't deserve a day like this but I always feel guilty if I do something nice for myself. Lastly, it would cost too much. 

    What would you do if you could have a day all to yourself and there was nothing holding you back?

    Be in control of your own happiness.
  • TheMomFactorTheMomFactor
    Posts: 5,092Member
    I would read and go shopping, neither of which can be done without my kids most days. Oh, and go to the movies. *sigh* Not to mention taking a bath with SO and SLEEP. Lots of SLEEP.
    "Anybody remotely interesting is mad in some way."-The Seventh Doctor

    "One may tolerate a world of demons for the sake of an angel."
  • shate98shate98
    Posts: 5,020Member
    I second the go to the movies. I miss that...
    "As you wander through your life, whatever be your goal,
    keep your eye upon the doughnut, not upon the hole."
  • HorridWenchHorridWench
    Posts: 702Member
    Sleep, smoke weed, sleep, eat my own food, sleep, shower, smoke more weed, paint my toes, watch a movie uninterrupted,shave my whole leg, sleep...in that order ;)
    "She Dances in a Ring of Fire and Throws Off the Challenge, With a Shrug" - Jim Morrison
  • CaffeineJunkieCaffeineJunkie
    Posts: 70Member
    Funny you should mention, my DH is going out of town for a business trip next week (a full 48 hours) and I plan on sending the kids to daycare those 2 days, calling in sick at work and voila, 2 whole glorious days (daytimes anyways) to myself.  And I don't feel one bit guilty.  I need a break and I never, ever get alone time at home (DH often works from home).  My plans include dropping off the kids, picking up a bottle of wine, some brie, really good sushi and the most decadent dark chocolate I can find.  I will then take an un-interrupted bath, give my self a cute pedicure (which I can't do like ever cause DH has issues with the smell of nail polish) all while having a Doctor Who TV watching marathon as I drool over the various yummy actors :)   And that's just day one... OMG it's going to be fucking awesome.  Now that I'm this excited though, watch one of the kids fall sick or one of daycares close or something.
  • just_mejust_me
    Posts: 1,035Member
    Wahoo @caffeinejunkie I'll keep my fingers crossed that you get your time! I used to do that once a year when I had a "real" job...I'd call in sick when everyone else was at daycare or work...now I'm the daycare provider. And p.s. I love it when my parents bring their kids so they can have a day to themselves....all parents need it! Now id really really love to have even an hour by myself! First of all I'd clean the house so its nice and relaxing...then I'd take a hot bath, then I'd smoke a ton of cigarettes while reading a great really steamy book. Ohhhh yeahhhhh...it would he nice! Ooppps baby crying :(( guess I better quit daydreaming. Oh poop!
    I can't be perfect all the time...so give it up already!
  • fatchickonabikefatchickonabike
    Posts: 6,590Member
    How well I remember feeling that way! My fantasies about spending 24 hours in a hotel room solo were far more vivid than anything sexual, let me tell you. I wouldn't even have gone out, I swear. Me, a soak in the tub, the TV and maybe a good book to read, along with an uninterrupted night's sleep would have been my idea of heaven. Never happened. Six weeks of stress leave did, though.
    Part of growing up is learning to forgive your parents for being human.
  • forkinthehead
    Posts: 482Member
    I can remember feeling that way. From experience I can tell you that too much of anything loses it's luster. If you need a day a way take one everytime that you can. You might come home to a mess and you might not. You will however be prepared for the mess if there is one. Let daddy take the reins for a day or two. They are more than capable if we just let them do it. So what if they do it their way.

    I won't lie I do enjoy my free time. Though at times it does get boring. You might not get what I am saying now...but you will as your daughter gets older. As they age they need us less. Before you know it they are grown up and gone living their own lives. It hits you before you know it happened.
  • horsehotti
    Posts: 560Member
    I say go!! I went to stay with my mom for a week. It was amazing!! I went shopping, laid around the house watching tv, hung out with my mom and her bf. Dh was amazing. This is my 3rd trip like this. It's become a yearly thing. I get away from the cold, stress and hassle. He gets a week doing what I do! He always happy when I get back.
  • KrabbyKay
    Posts: 5,914Member
    I'd watch tv! Get a massage! Read my fucking BOOK without being bugged! SLEEP! 
  • KrysondraKrysondra
    Posts: 38Member
    If I had 24 hours to myself, I would schedule a long massage, read books, catch up on all my email and mail, and treat myself out to eat for all the meals.  I wouldn't lift a finger to clean or pick up a thing. 
    "Too long I've been afraid of
    Losing love I guess I've lost
    Well, if that's love
    It comes at much too high a cost!"
    WICKED ~ DEFYING GRAVITY
  • gramalibbygramalibby
    Posts: 3,744Member
    I wish Grama could help you all have a "breather" . Poof get away dust......ya know sometimes you gotta be creative. Now that we are retired and very broke we get creative.....If any moms can get away for a day.....Couch Surfing is FREE to spend a night away....our last CS was last weekend and we only traveled a 100 miles.... dooable
  • SasafrasSasafras
    Posts: 1,627Member
    I'm with @forkintheroad let go of the reigns and let your husband be the primary care giver. Even if you have a mess, they survived and you got time that is well deserved.
    Maybe it's just me but I could give two shits about a mess, both dh and I work over 80 a pay period and if the house is dirty oh well it'll be cleaned when we have a day off or energy. I will never look back and wished I had a cleaner house.
  • irishdoeirishdoe
    Posts: 116Member
    I haven't had a "day off " since I was pregnant with now dd2 and spent the night in the hospital, then the next 3 months on bed rest. Oh wait, still had dd3 (then 1yr old) so just the one night. After that, I haven't had one night away from my kids. Since dd is going to be 4, it is going on 4 years!! They go everywhere we go. Yes I would love a night off!! A bath, movie, massage, uninterrupted sleep. Heaven.
    It's not all good.
  • CinnaCinna
    Posts: 1,841Member
    @caffeinejunkie my DH went on a 3 day trip 1.5 years ago and I still think of it fondly. Best three days ever! Breakfast & lunch out, eating in front of the tv, going to bed at 2 am, I even threw my clothes on the floor & didn't pick them up til later. I enjoyed it so much one of my friends suggested I buy him an airline ticket for Christmas lol. (Of course it would really be a gift for me)
    Two hearts! Oh baby I'm beating out a samba!
  • meandmy243meandmy243
    Posts: 9,474Member
    Id end up sleeping the whole time and doung nothing else and being mad for sleeping..
    let them eat cake! because id rather have pie!!!
  • ABCABC
    Posts: 4,100Member
    I have control issues lol...and sadly I have a hard time with messes. I know it's not the end of life but I haven't learned to let it go. Sad because now I suffer for it! Ugh. Anyway, love these comments! Many perspectives :-)
    Be in control of your own happiness.
  • GrainneGrainne
    Posts: 1,028Member
    I have control issues and manage a lot around the home as I work less hours (trade off which is good with me). I have 4 girlfriends I've had forever (one since kindergarten and we are now in our 40's!!!!) and I went away for a girls weekend first time 2 years ago with them. I was totally anxious about how they would do without me but it went fine. And I had a fantastic time was first time away from kids since they were born (they were 3 at the first time). We have now made it an annual get together. Last year we went to an island and it was heavenly 2 nights away lots if wine hiking conversation and just being. I came back totally rejuvenated. And it was a good thing for dh and the boys Do it!!!!
  • CaffeineJunkieCaffeineJunkie
    Posts: 70Member
    The way I see it is, time away from family and kids is not a bad thing.  Especially for those of us who are either always working or always tending to the kids.  Even the best mommy starts to go a little grumpy and nuts if she never gets alone time.  So if you have the chance go for it.  You will come back feeling rejuvenated, relaxed and you'll regain that appreciation for your kids and DH.  DH gave me this gift last year (took the kids and himself over to his parent's place 3 hours away to give me a real break) it was heavenly.  I did miss them but it gave me that recharge I so desperately needed.
  • ABCABC
    Posts: 4,100Member
    I think once I let go of the fact that I am not a superhuman I will be able to let go and let loose...now when I will decide to do this...who knows?!
    Be in control of your own happiness.
  • 3bluetulips3bluetulips
    Posts: 19Member
    I did this a few months ago, cause I was thinking of leaving my husband, and was pissed about the lack of his doing anything around the house. I wanted him to take the kids for two whole days and see how it feels. It backfired on me. He was perfectly fine and felt no stress. Me, I stayed with my sister, fought with her, and got grossed out cause she had bed bugs and roaches. I then spent the next month scrubbing my house cause I kept thinking I brought them home with me.
    I would love a day or two now, I would sleep, take a bath, eat ice cream and cake for all three meals. I would sit and flip through channels, just cause I could ( we don't currently have TV). I would take at least two naps a day as well. Sigh, I would really love to do this, and think there is nothing wrong with wanting it, needing it, and getting it.
    The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any. Alice Walker
    Always be a first rate version of yourself, instead of a second rate version of somebody else. Judy Garland
    Don't get comfortable with who you are at any given time - you may miss the opportunity to become who you want to be. Jon Bon Jovi
  • TheHeadacheslayer
    Posts: 2,472Member
    @ABC I hear you honey. I used to be able to get out by myself but now I only have a manual wheelchair and I can't maneuver it myself. Plus I really don't like to drive with the meds I'm on. I miss those days where grocery shopping by myself was fun.

    Dream Day, in honor of this Sunday....

    I would wake up in a luxurious hotel room. Room service brings in not only a fantastic breakfast, but my clothes for the day, no wrinkles in sight.

    Then I would go for a very gentle massage, hot stone perhaps. Soak in a lovely hot tub. A facial, mani/pedi. There would be a lovely lunch, healthy, light.

    I would, of course, check in on Scary Mommy and post pictures.

    Next, time for the hairdresser, then makeup. Because I'm getting dressed to go to the Oscars, of course. I have staff to help me into my couture gown, anything BUT black. No way.

    When the limo picks me up, I know there is a long line of limos ahead of me. So I spend some time on Scary Mommy while I sip champagne and eat strawberries (dipped in dark chocolate). My makeup artist is with me to touch me up before....

    The walk down the red carpet. Now I'm only a Scary Mommy so no one asks me for my photo or autograph except a couple of new journalists from some far off country I can't pronounce (hey I'm bad in history and geography). I have my own camera to catch a few snapshots of the stars. And naturally Hugh Laurie, (who is there because this is MY dream day dammit) gives me a charming smile and a wink. 

    I'm escorted to my seat inside the theatre....I may not be seated with the nominees but I am there. It is magnificent. I can now die happy. Billy Crystal AND Hugh Jackman are hosting because they heard I was going to be there.

    Obviously I go to all the after parties (except now I've changed into another gown, purely fun now), rub elbows with the stars, and tell Daniel Craig to call me. Because let's face it who wouldn't want to hear his voice?

    This is one Cinderella who doesn't have to be home by midnight ;)

    And THAT is my dream day. Sigh.
  • HorridWenchHorridWench
    Posts: 702Member
    Sounds magical @theheadacheslayer
    "She Dances in a Ring of Fire and Throws Off the Challenge, With a Shrug" - Jim Morrison