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Scaries
  • unforgivenunforgiven
    Posts: 12,891Confessional Manager
    image

    Use this thread to list your favorite confessions from the week and maybe even claim one you're willing to fess up to!

    The confessions will be featured on the homepage of ScaryMommy. 
    They could also be featured on the Scary Mommy Pinterest page!


    MOST LIKED: 265733 - Just found out the child I am pregnant with has Downs. And after the shock,WE ARE SO EXCITED!

    MOST HUGGED: 265032 - Son was arrested last night for 2 armed robberies. Mommy fail. I'm so embarrassed.

    MOST OMG ME TOO: 265175 - When I get overwhelmed I yell /throw a tantrum & then feel like the worst mother on earth. I apologize but can't undo words. Why can'y I be a Mom like those who are calm & sweet to their kids always? sigh I love my sons.

            :) BEST OF CONFESSIONS CHOSEN BY YOUR CONFESSIONAL MANAGERS :)

    265619: Took a nap with ds4 today. Woke up with a hot wheels car stuck to my ass.

    265653: I was so eager to have my kids back in school we sat in the drop off line today until exactly time for school to start. A teacher had to come inform me class starts tomorrow! no one else was even in "line" I was in denial.

    265875: My toddler just handed me my vibrator. Time to put locks on the drawers.

    265913: Potty training; It's all fun and games until someone loses a sticker in the potty.

    265947: I totally farted in my 5 yr old DS's face to get back at him for being a little asshole in the bathtub before bed. I love him dearly, but it was fun watching him gasp for air! Ha!

    266194: If I hold anything in my arms over 5 pounds, I instantly start rocking back and forth. The line at the store was long enough that I finally got that damn watermelon to sleep! :)

    267191: My one year old was licking something sticky off the floor. Instead of stopping her, I let her continue because lunch wasn't quite finished and it was keeping her occupied.

    267398: I'm loving child labor! Dd7 wanted to mop living room, hallway, her room, and ds4 room. Win. For $1? Double win. Good job child...

    266594: Someone ran off with my slender body, flat tummy, perky boobs and nice thick hair! Oh yeah, it was f****** motherhood!

    264953: Since rolling over after drunken sex and looking my DH straight in the eye and saying "I coulda had a V8", he has REALLY put in some effort in the bedroom.Should have said it years ago!

    confessional-manager

    "What looks like torture is a time to rejoice
    What sounds like thunder is a comforting voice
    When what is beautiful looks broken and crushed
    And I say I don't know you
    But you say it's finished"
  • WickedBitchoftheEastWickedBitchoftheEast
    Posts: 923Member
    I've rocked a watermelon too. Amongst other inanimate objects that seemingly needed rocked.
  • irishlassirishlass
    Posts: 6,762Member
    The scaries are the highlight of my monday :)
    "Be who you are and say what you feel. Because those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter." - Dr. Seuss
  • Lakegirl34
    Posts: 1,754Member
    Mine too @irishlass! My Monday feels incomplete until I've read them.
  • sunnymommasunnymomma
    Posts: 2,264Member
    I still rock inanimate objects!!! 15 years later! lol glad im not alone! 
    “There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life.”
    ― John Lennon
  • eappleeapple
    Posts: 1,375Member
    Me too @Irishlass and @lakegirl34!

    I loved the coulda had a v8! Hehe
    And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music. ~Nietzsche
  • Nearlynormal
    Posts: 2Member
    I'm new here. Is there a place to introduce or do you just kind of jump in? LOVE confessions. I was up til 2 am reading and laughing my ass of Friday night!!
  • pennypenny
    Posts: 799Member
    When DS was 5 months we went to a concert by the artist who sings the lullaby I always used. I bounced and rocked my beer when he sang it at the show.
  • fatchickonabikefatchickonabike
    Posts: 5,512Member
    I totally tried to burp a puppy once.
    "The most essential gift for a good writer is a built-in, shock-proof bullshit detector.” - Ernest Hemingway
  • unforgivenunforgiven
    Posts: 12,891Confessional Manager
    @nearlynormal just jump in!

    confessional-manager

    "What looks like torture is a time to rejoice
    What sounds like thunder is a comforting voice
    When what is beautiful looks broken and crushed
    And I say I don't know you
    But you say it's finished"
  • Luvlyssa
    Posts: 2,913Member
    @fatchickonabike did you know you can burp kitties and doggies? and they do kinda need it if they're on formula/nursing? (mostly formula) :) 
    Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming. What do we do? We swim, swim.
  • junglezoo
    Posts: 248Member
    My favorite was 266594. Wish I could say it was me but alas even before motherhood I never had flat tummy or slender bod....it was just average. Still made me laugh :)
    I'm going to the zoo zoo zoo. You can come too too too....
  • fatchickonabikefatchickonabike
    Posts: 5,512Member

    @Luvlyssa, I did not know that. Makes sense, though!

    "The most essential gift for a good writer is a built-in, shock-proof bullshit detector.” - Ernest Hemingway
  • LesboMomLesboMom
    Posts: 2,878Confessional Manager
    This was a good week with lots of funny confessions :) 

    confessional-manager

    Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see a shadow. -- Helen Keller
  • OpheliaOphelia
    Posts: 3,300Member
    264953: Since rolling over after drunken sex and looking my DH straight in the eye and saying "I coulda had a V8", he has REALLY put in some effort in the bedroom.Should have said it years ago!

    That made me snort
    Nothing left to do but smile, smile, smile.. -Grateful Dead<3
  • wonderwomanx3
    Posts: 468Member
    I've rocked & bounced our 10 lb cat before. What??! He was upset. :D
  • Hippiechick
    Posts: 49Member
    #265653 I was the mom at the school dropping off my kids on the wrong day. I guess I really needed a break #-o

    The confession about the watermelon is hilarious! I told my husband I was gonna rock my way into a mental institution one day. I catch myself rocking with nothing in my arms X_X
  • LesboMomLesboMom
    Posts: 2,878Confessional Manager
    @hippiechick That was one of my very favorites!!! 

    confessional-manager

    Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see a shadow. -- Helen Keller
  • KateGirl
    Posts: 9Mmember
    I love this...ypu are funny girl

    blockquote rel="Ophelia">264953: Since rolling over after drunken sex and looking my DH straight in the eye and saying "I coulda had a V8", he has REALLY put in some effort in the bedroom.Should have said it years ago!

    That made me snort

  • KrabbyKay
    Posts: 2,423Member
    @Hippiechick I rocked for the LONGEST time with nothing! Well it was more swaying when standing, or sometimes jiggling nothing (my son was a huge fan of jiggling). DS is 8 now and it seems to have gone away...or else I don't notice anymore! Gosh what a scary idea!!
  • undercoverbanana
    Posts: 7,745Member

    #266194   omg....i do that, too. i have rocked puppies, kittens, purses, and the occaisonal gallon of milk to sleep. glad i'm not the only one!

    bad news.....that reflex never goes away.

    i'm nekkid.
  • unforgivenunforgiven
    Posts: 12,891Confessional Manager
    I rock back and forth when I'm waiting in line... whether something is in my arms or not.

    confessional-manager

    "What looks like torture is a time to rejoice
    What sounds like thunder is a comforting voice
    When what is beautiful looks broken and crushed
    And I say I don't know you
    But you say it's finished"
  • HorridWenchHorridWench
    Posts: 712Member
    264953: Since rolling over after drunken sex and looking my DH straight in the eye and saying "I coulda had a V8", he has REALLY put in some effort in the bedroom.Should have said it years ago!


    Was Me :D
    "She Dances in a Ring of Fire and Throws Off the Challenge, With a Shrug" - Jim Morrison
  • MommyInMI
    Posts: 2Member
    I rock too even if I'm just holding my purse.  My Aunt asked me once while waiting to use the bathroom what I was doing and I looked at said "Rocking the baby."  I haven't had a "baby" in 11 years. 
  • DaisyChain
    Posts: 79Member
    266194: If I hold anything in my arms over 5 pounds, I instantly start rocking back and forth. The line at the store was long enough that I finally got that damn watermelon to sleep! :)
     
    LOL
     
  • DaisyChain
    Posts: 79Member
    Since when does LOL make 3 smileys?
  • Luna523Luna523
    Posts: 390Member
    267398 was me :-D Just saw this thread
  • BlessieBlessie
    Posts: 1,500Member
    I rock... I tell myself it is to help my hips.
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